[Bread-Baking Typewriter] Shouting Respect at the Heart of 'Nukalhyeop'

‘Nukalhyeop’ was one of the most commonly used abbreviations in Korean society last year. It means "Who threatened you with a knife?" and implies that others' misfortunes are entirely due to their own choices. Beyond simply personalizing responsibility, it also contains insults, criticism, and sarcasm toward individuals.

Nukalhyeop appeared in the Itaewon tragedy that occurred in October last year. People responded to the 159 victims and their bereaved families by saying, "Who pushed you to go to the Itaewon disaster site?" Insults toward the victims continued not only in online spaces but also at Itaewon Square, where a memorial altar for the victims was set up. The conservative group Shin Jayu Yeondae reported a rally next to the altar and poured out insults that were hard to even mention to the bereaved families.

Regarding the social trend of declining trust, Reinhard Haller, author of We Need Respect, diagnoses that the world has now entered an "era of indifference." As a psychiatrist, Haller points out, "A wide range of aggressive behaviors, including self-directed aggression such as suicide, domestic violence, and terrorism, stem from issues of respect," adding, "People lacking respect have low self-esteem and use strategies to belittle others like the 'one-eyed king in the land of the blind.'"

Although insult and respect are opposing concepts, they share similarities. Both are not outwardly visible or flashy. Moreover, the outcomes of both insult and respect develop into tremendous psychological energy. However, the crucial difference is that insults flow in a negative direction, while respect develops positively. Individuals who are insulted experience continuous stress. Yet, Haller notes that individuals find it difficult to reveal the insults they have suffered to society. The psychology of the insulted person festers further, and people struggle with social interactions. Ultimately, insults toward one person can lead to social destruction.

Haller proposes "respect" as the solution. Viewing respect as the "antidote" of society, he explains that respect toward others returns to oneself. Respect based on empathy, consideration, and recognition leads to a virtuous cycle, including increased self-esteem. As a psychiatrist, Haller emphasizes that when respect is put into action, the brain areas responsible for emotions are activated, and oxytocin is released. Oxytocin, also called the "love hormone," fosters bonds, trust, and consideration toward others.

Haller stresses the need to strive to cultivate habits of respect in daily life. He explains that respect in everyday life is not easily acquired by simply changing thoughts but requires changing one’s attitude, thinking, and emotional capacity. To do so, one must have an "open mind." This involves shedding prejudices, having the will to communicate with others, and meeting them at their level. Flexibility that does not absolutize one’s own views is also necessary. However, this does not mean losing oneself and accepting everything. Haller argues that if criticism is made by first mentioning the possibility of improvement toward others, society will change healthily.

Currently, in Korean society, emphasizing solidarity, empathy, emotion, and respect without reason is often labeled as naive. However, Haller explains that humans fundamentally need love and praise. Furthermore, respect does not simply protect the weak but holds the power to change society. If you are tired of a society filled only with endless insults and contempt, this book is recommended. A small change in one person can transform society from one of Nukalhyeop to one of respect.

We Need Respect | Reinhard Haller | Onward | 280 pages | 16,000 KRW

This content was produced with the assistance of AI translation services.