[SSG nudge Leadership] The Wisdom to Avoid a Kkondae Image with 'Kadeora' Conversation Style

- How to Express the Precious Truths Realized Throughout a Lifetime

Changwook Park, CEO of Korea Knowledge Leader Association (Secretary General of Daewoo World Management Research Association)

As I grow older, the valuable truths I have realized in life become clearer. I deeply regret not knowing them earlier or having someone tell me. When studying and researching to guide young people’s careers and employment on a global scale, I develop a sense of duty to share these insights. However, when I try to tell them, young people tend to avoid it. They seem to think of me as a nagging old-timer. My daughter and even my subordinates at the office are no exception. It’s a frustrating dilemma.

For several years now, I have been using a technique in my lectures that has proven quite effective. I casually insert the word “kadeora” during conversations. As you know, “kadeora” is a Gyeongsang-do dialect expression meaning “someone said” or “I heard that.” It’s used when it’s difficult to specify the source or evidence of something heard elsewhere, and when one’s mouth itches to say it. That’s why rumors were called “kadeora communication.” It corresponds to today’s term “fake news.”

I use this method to nag my children. “Yesterday, Dad met with high school alumni, and it just so happened that the HR manager of a company popular among university students these days was a junior by 15 years. A dad of a job seeker asked him to share just a few types of candidates who are always rejected in interviews. He said that regardless of job knowledge or qualifications, if concentration is lacking, they are always rejected. When someone asked what specific behaviors or signs those were, he said that during the interview, if the candidate’s gaze is scattered or if their eyes seem to be thinking about something else while exchanging questions with other interviewees, that’s a sign. If their eyes frequently shift to their phone during casual conversation, that’s very likely. They analyzed complaints from clients caused by hiring such types.”

I told them everything I wanted to say by presenting it as something a junior said that might interest them. If I said it directly, it would likely be heard as “nagging from an old-timer.”

I also tried this approach in conversations with my wife. “Honey! You know those talk shows with celebrities on TV? I happened to watch one where actor Kim Seong-woo (a pseudonym) said he went bankrupt due to fraud because he didn’t listen to his wife. It felt like he was talking about me, so I flinched. He deeply regrets it and now discusses everything with his wife. He said he will always consult with his wife from now on.”

She replied, “You’re only learning about that actor’s case now? I told you so long ago. If you start doing that now, I’ll be happy too.” Through someone else’s story, we found a way to reconcile.

I often use this method in university lectures as well. There was a student who wore a hat during every class. According to a popular company’s HR manager in the university area, “Yesterday, I had the chance to listen to a lecture by an HR manager of a department store. Interviewers really dislike candidates who always wear hats. It’s immediately noticeable when they enter the interview room. They ask directly, ‘Do you often wear hats?’ If the answer is ‘yes,’ they are immediately classified as failing. They mentioned three bad habits that are ingrained in such candidates.”

“First, the charge of being lazy. Department store employees must have exceptional grooming and cleanliness and be diligent. Second, the charge of lacking consideration because they block the view of people behind them. Lastly, the charge of lacking confidence because they avoid eye contact. They can avoid eye contact by slightly lowering their head. It was quite a relatable explanation. You should be careful too, as it can quickly become a habit...”

Then he called on a junior who served as a conscripted police officer at a checkpoint. “When inspecting buses, if someone walks back and forth along the central aisle, they always check the ID of one or two people. The criterion for selecting those people is ‘those who avoid eye contact.’”

This conversational technique of casually inserting “kadeora” is also used when lecturing office workers or company CEOs. It can be applied to subordinates as well.

Park Chang-wook, CEO of Korea Knowledge Leader Association (Secretary General of Daewoo Global Management Research Association)

◆ What is ‘Nudge Leadership’?

? ‘Nudge Leadership’ is about leading organizational or personal change through small and gentle interventions or motivation rather than coercive or directive methods. It also involves improving human relationships through one’s own small changes and transforming into someone others want to follow. Ultimately, it breathes creativity and passion into organizations or relationships, creating new value and happiness.

This content was produced with the assistance of AI translation services.