[SSG nudge Leadership] Global Etiquette? "I Just Watch for a While and Then Follow Along."

Manner Principles to Apply in Global Activities

How to Hold a Wine Glass

“Why do you hold the glass like that when you drink? If you do, your body heat touches the wine and lowers its quality.” This was a teasing remark I received from a friend about three years ago while holding a wine glass. These days, I often find myself drinking wine. Since gatherings are small due to social distancing and wine is said to be good for health, it’s just perfect to enjoy with friends or people around at a reasonable price.

According to my friend, who knows a bit about wine, you should hold the stem (the slender middle part of the wine glass) and gently swirl it with a wrist snap when drinking. The reason you shouldn’t wrap your hand around the bowl is that your body warmth affects the taste of the wine, and swirling is recommended because it allows the wine to come into contact with air for an appropriate amount of time, enhancing its flavor. That’s what I thought, and I sometimes passed this advice on to others.

Embarrassment from a Flimsy Cultural Theory

However, I ended up embarrassed. Because I have worked in HR at a global company for a long time, I am often asked to give lectures on office etiquette and global manners. I always include simple dining manners in these talks. When discussing drinking etiquette, I included the wine glass holding method. Then, during a break, one of the attendees quietly came over and said, “Instructor, I don’t think that’s necessarily true. If you look at photos of state dinners in the US or European countries, the leaders just hold their wine glasses comfortably. I checked photos of dinners with US Presidents Obama and Trump, French Presidents Mitterrand and Macron, UK Prime Minister Johnson, and German Chancellor Merkel, and they all hold their glasses in various ways. On the other hand, Chinese President Xi Jinping and our past Korean presidents almost always hold the stem. Whether from the knowledge I have or advice from protocol officers, there doesn’t seem to be any strict rule. I felt embarrassed for pretending to know and realized I was just making a fool of myself.”

Amidst Such Diverse Cultures

Especially over the past ten years, I have traveled frequently to Southeast Asian countries for work, meeting many different people and experiencing diverse cultures. Now that I am over sixty, I often find myself in senior positions at gatherings. It became necessary to have a standard for how I should conduct myself when meeting not only seniors or superiors but also juniors and subordinates.

Proper etiquette is not only about avoiding discomfort to others but also about establishing oneself as an attractive and desirable companion after meeting. Whether on a global level, within an organization between superiors and subordinates, or even among close friends...

Always Adapt to the Other Person

The conclusion is: “Wait and observe for a moment. Then, follow exactly how the person you are with holds their glass. Just smoothly follow along.”

Going a step further, even if someone criticizes you for being wrong, don’t argue. Instead, say, “I see, I learned something,” and adapt. Etiquette is not a ticket that grants entry only to those who follow fixed rules at fixed places, but rather a standard approached with a heart of consideration that holds the other person’s hand in any situation. The word ‘Manner’ is said to come from the Latin word Manus, meaning ‘hand.’ Let’s think of it not as right or wrong but as different and behave accordingly. The more detailed your thoughts and actions are in meetings with others, the better, but it’s impossible to remember everything.

A few days ago, while dining with a friend who is very active in global business, he said something similar about holding a wine glass. I told him, “Let’s not overthink it. Wait a moment, then smoothly match the other person.” He replied, “Professor Park, that’s a great principle. I’ll do just that.”

Park Chang-wook, CEO of Korea Knowledge Leader Association (Secretary General of Daewoo World Management Research Association)

◆ What is ‘Nudge Leadership’?

- ‘Nudge Leadership’ is about leading change in organizations or individuals through small and gentle interventions or motivation rather than coercive or directive methods. It also involves improving human relationships through one’s own small changes and transforming into a person others want to follow. Ultimately, it breathes creativity and passion into organizations and relationships, creating new value and happiness.

This content was produced with the assistance of AI translation services.