[How About This Book] Your Light Smile Saves a Struggling Life

Causes of Extreme Suicide More Diverse Than Expected
Misconceptions Like Related Conversations Encouraging Suicide Must Be Corrected
Encourage 'Active Listening' by Observing Others' Reactions

"Every 40 seconds, someone somewhere in this world dies by suicide."

According to Lori O'Connor, a world-renowned expert who has studied suicide for over 25 years, more than 800,000 people worldwide take their own lives each year. Three-quarters (79%) of global suicide incidents occur in low- and middle-income countries, and 60% of all suicides happen in Asia. Although it is commonly believed that suicide rates are higher in high-income countries, the author points out that this is a misconception due to ignoring social contexts. Different countries record deaths by suicide differently and interpret those deaths culturally, religiously, and politically in various ways. In at least 25 countries, suicide is considered illegal, and under Islamic law, attempted suicide is punishable.

The fact that male suicide rates are higher than female rates also requires proper interpretation. It is true that male suicide rates exceed those of females. In the UK, three-quarters of suicide victims are men. In the US, men die by suicide 3.7 times more than women. While cultural standards and expectations around masculinity, associations with alcohol, and the shock men experience from loss of intimacy are factors to consider, the main reason is the "success rate." The author emphasizes that men often use more lethal means than women, resulting in a higher fatality rate.

The author devotes much space to correcting public misunderstandings about suicide. The core message is that "suicide is not an act of desiring death, but an act to end unbearable mental pain." The author explains, "There is a limit to the amount of mental pain we can endure, and when we reach that limit, we must give up something beyond it. Sadly, too many people pay that price with their lives."

There are many misconceptions about suicide. The author addresses various common beliefs such as "people who talk about suicide are not at risk," "asking if someone is thinking about suicide implants the idea," and "suicide results from a single cause," correcting each one. While it is often thought that those who truly intend to die by suicide quietly contemplate and act, the author explains that there is fluctuation based on the "duality of suicidal thoughts and impulses," and the pattern is more complex than expected. In many cases, suicide is not the goal but an unavoidable choice to end suffering, and at the edge of life, people may reach out for help.

The notion that asking about suicide can encourage it is also refuted. The author points out that there is no evidence supporting this belief and instead says that asking about suicide has a protective effect. The evidence comes from a study conducted years ago by researchers at King's College London involving patients hospitalized after suicide attempts. Most patients responded that questions about suicide actually suppressed their suicidal impulses.

The author details the process leading to suicide and shares prevention methods accordingly. While acknowledging that suicide causes are very complex and preventing all suicides is practically impossible, the author says that suicide rates can be reduced with even small efforts.

Based on 25 years of research, the author found common signs among those who died by suicide. These include expressions like "I feel trapped" or "I'm just a burden to others," organizing personal affairs such as distributing valuable belongings or writing a will, and engaging in risky behaviors like excessive drinking or drug use, all identified as "warning signs." The author also explains that a sudden improvement in mood in a depressed person may not indicate recovery but rather a firm decision that suicide is the solution to their problems.

So how should one respond in such cases? The method is surprisingly simple. The author recommends "active listening," gently observing the other person's reactions without being overwhelmed by the weight of suicide. Such attentive listening helps those contemplating suicide escape the helplessness of feeling out of control.

In fact, a few years ago, the author's friend "Ryan" was about to leave home after deciding to die by suicide but changed his mind after a chance encounter with an acquaintance. Although they were not close, the acquaintance approached with a smiling face and a concerned expression, saying, "Hello. Is something wrong?" That single phrase shone a ray of light into Ryan's otherwise dark world.

The author, who has lost a mentor and colleagues to suicide and was led into suicide research by that mentor, urges, "Let us remember that a simple smile can save another person's life."

Before Letting Go of the Last Thread | Written by Lori O'Connor | Translated by Jeong Ji-ho | Simsim | 424 pages | 24,000 KRW

This content was produced with the assistance of AI translation services.