[MZ Column] Deciding to Leave a Law Firm

Not long ago, I decided to resign from the law firm where I was working. There were worried looks from those around me, and some asked if I was confident I would succeed. I, too, had my doubts, and I didn’t exactly have great confidence in my success. However, when I think about it, there has never been a time in my life when I made a major decision filled only with unwavering certainty.

Although I have published several books, I have never been filled with absolute confidence that each book would be a success. When I got married or when my child was born, I didn’t have any particular confidence that I would have a perfect marriage or raise my child exceptionally well. Even when I went to law school at a later age, I had no certainty that I would be the top of my class or pass the bar exam without fail.

However, with each of those choices, I did have a different kind of certainty. It was the certainty that whatever choice I made, I would do my best in the life that was given to me because of that choice. The decisions in life were always made with the hope that I could live a more genuine life true to myself. And once I made that choice with such hope, all I had to do was devote myself wholeheartedly to that life.

The first thing I did after deciding to resign was to apply to become a public defender. There is a saying that “the only lawyers who won’t go to hell are public defenders.” I wanted to understand the true meaning behind that saying. Although I would also handle private cases, I thought I should learn why public defenders have such a reputation among lawyers.

I have no confidence in success. But since this is the one and only life I have, and I am choosing my work and profession, I do want to understand the meaning of that work better. So I am confident that the path I want to take will help me better understand the meaning of my work and my life. I think I have always lived not with delusional confidence in success, but with confidence that I am moving toward a life true to myself.

So I decided to find my own journey. In fact, while working at the company, there were many proposals and meetings I had to refuse. Even with lectures or contributions, I had to turn down about half of them, but now I plan to reconnect with those opportunities. I intend to diligently roam the world, meet people, find my role, and continue practicing finding meaning in life. What I am seeking is not success like becoming the “top of the industry,” but rather walking through the world and loving life in my own way.

Furthermore, I think it is fortunate that I can spend a little more time with my child during what could be called the last years of their childhood. Last winter, it was always dark by the time I got home from work, so it was difficult to even make a snowman with my child. On weekends, the snow had already melted or become dirty. Since I always came home late in the evening, I couldn’t properly cook even once. As someone who manages time, I want to become a person who spends time better with family. That, too, will be one way I live my life more fully.

Life is always practice and experiment. For me, resigning is also a practice and experiment to live my life better. Regardless of the success or failure of this attempt, I plan to do my best in the time given to me. Likewise, I want to cheer for all the people in the world who are doing their best in their own choices.

Jung Ji-woo, Cultural Critic

This content was produced with the assistance of AI translation services.