[Sunday Culture] "No Reckless Advice" Posters Appear... Japan's Busybody 'Oshiema'

Not long ago, it was the great national holiday, Seollal. It was nice to see close people after a long time, but on the other hand, many of you might have had a hard time dealing with the various nagging from relatives you met after a while. College, employment, dating, marriage, promotion... Why are there so many aspects in life that we have to be evaluated on? Every time that happens, I want to shout, "Thank you for your concern, but I will handle it myself."

In Korea, there is a newly coined word for people who interfere excessively called 'Ojilapeo.' It is a word made by attaching the English suffix 'er' to 'ojilap' (interference). Japan also has a term for such interfering people. It is called 'Oshiema (おしえ魔).' This word is made by combining the word for 'teaching' and the kanji for 'demon.'

'No Osie-ma' poster posted at the RC car circuit. (Photo by X account @M3M11X)

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Japan also suffers from oshiema, and there are even places where posters banning interference have been put up. The poster slogans, such as "Who asked you?" give a refreshing feeling. Today, we will tell you about Japan's oshiema.

In Japan, since a few years ago, posters saying 'No Oshiema' have been posted in bowling alleys, gyms, and other places. In 2021, a poster in a bowling alley was featured on a nationwide morning broadcast, attracting attention. The poster said, "Do you know what the biggest concern of bowling alleys nationwide is? It is customers coaching other customers in bowling," and "Please refrain from teaching."

Last year, the Shizuoka Prefecture Golf Practice Range Association distributed posters warning practice range owners about oshiema, which also became a hot topic. Even in RC car circuit tracks, a hobby for adults, oshiema appeared. A company operating an RC car circuit posted a poster with direct phrases that attracted attention. Along with illustrations, it said, "Stop bragging," "Who asked for that advice?" and "Don't impose your values." It even stated that malicious oshiema could be banned from entry.

So why do these oshiema appear? It is said that the desire for recognition plays a big role. Junko Okamoto, famous for business speech coaching, said, "Giving advice gives the advisor a sense of power as if they are above," and "People who have a strong desire to be recognized or to exert influence or power over others are more likely to become oshiema."

'Oshiema Prohibition' poster distributed by the Shizuoka Prefecture Golf Practice Range Association. (Photo by eGolf)

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However, advice is often perceived merely as nagging or interference. According to research from Harvard University, whether a person accepts advice depends on three factors. The first is whether it costs money to get the advice. If you pay a consultation fee to a lawyer for legal advice, you have no choice but to listen.

The second is when the person giving advice is clearly a 'professional' or 'expert.' Advice from doctors or professors is easier to accept.

The third depends on whether the listener is in a state willing to accept advice. No matter how expert the teacher is, if the listener is not in a state to seek advice or opinions, it has no effect.

The Japanese online economic media Toyokeizai introduced ways to avoid becoming an oshiema. They said not to give advice unless asked, even if someone vents their worries, sometimes they just want someone to listen, so just exchange stories and help them find answers on their own, and even if the person is younger or lower in rank, if there is something to learn, do not hesitate to ask for advice.

However, there is also talk that oshiema should not be seen as merely annoying or troublesome. Since the COVID-19 pandemic, opportunities to talk with people have gradually decreased, and the number of people to listen is also decreasing. Perhaps oshiema stems from loneliness and the desire to have a conversation with someone.

Toyokeizai added, "This is consistent with why books related to communication methods have become popular since COVID-19," and "Speaking is a skill. It is necessary to learn communication skills that can connect with others."

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